giggle pop

A few weeks ago I posted my first educational post about the rare sex porcupine. This week you are in store for a math lesson.

I knew hottie Spanish athletes came in pocketsized like my little teaspoon Xavi. I also knew they came in medium size like cuties Sergio Garcia and David Villa. They also come in large like the always delish Iker Casillas and Sergio Ramos. However I had no idea they came in super duper extra large like Pau Gasol.


After my discovery of this 7 foot tall hunk of scruffy manmeat I started to wonder. So like any great scientist/thinker I started with a question, in this case the the question was “how many Xavi’s would be needed to make up just one Pau.” I now had a question to answer and I set out to do so, in the process I made a study of many others. This inspired me to come up with a mathematical equation that would make even Newton feel inferior. It takes into account both height and weight. I plugged a few of my favorite Spanish athletes of all sizes into this mysterious and highly secret equation and these were the results. This was a highly important and scientific study. I cannot predict the effects this will have on the mathematical community but I imagine they will be huge.

In order to get one Pau Gasol you would need the following amounts of these guys…
In order from smallest to largest

Andres “Casper” Ineiesta = 1.52
Xavi “TSP” Hernandez=1.46
Dahveed Veeyaa =1.43
Sergio Garcia =1.38
Sergio “THE” Ramos =1.36
Iker “Sexy Pants” Casillas =1.29
Fernando “Tobasco” Verdasco =1.26
Rafael “Biceps” Nadal =1.23

I am working on some reflections on the whole season for Real Madrid…well one for each league so I will keep myself from getting too gushy here.

Okay well I am going to get a little gushy here, I finally just watched this weeks game and it was Canna’s last game at the Bernabeau. I am going to miss that Italian. Not only am I going to miss his adorable overly happy smile, perfect shiny head, and peach of an ass that I want to bounce things off of. I think he was our strongest defender and brought a lot of class and experience to our defense. I know he was getting a bit old, but I think had another season in him, but witth politics at the club he is on his way back to Juventus. Best of luck back in Italy, you know I will be watching you sex up the Serie A even more in the black and white. It has been a great few seasons and you will be missed. With Canna gone our back line got a lot more unreliable. Mr. Perez pleaaaase get us some new defenders, really really good ones! Also Real Madrid just lost a lot of hot, good thing they have more than enough to go around. Iker may just have to step it up a little.


On a random other note, I am pretty sure he tastes like pasta.

I like to imagine Iker is crying at Canna leaving in this last pic, but I think his nose just itched

I keep hearing all these rumors about transfers this summer, it is all part of being a Madridista. There is one that pisses me off though, I keep hear Higuain is out the door to make way for big names. Ummmm bad idea, little Pipita is our best/most reliable player this season! He did not show up in every game, but he did show up when it counted a hell of a lot more than ANYONE else on the team.

He is young and has a ton of potential. I cannot even put into words how much this adorable little argie has grown this season. I think he should be a starter this next season and then swap out Raul/Hunty/Ruud. Gonzo is a playmaker the others are strong finishers and I think that is the best combo. Granted I think if a striker is going to go it should be one of the later three. Of course you cannot sell Raul, he is a legend and lives and breaths Real Madrid and more iconic than the RM crest itself. So that leaves Hunty and Ruud. As much as I love Ruud he is getting up there in years and been out for a season, so I say get some money off of selling his name and trust in the remaining three for at least another season.

While a player like Villa would be great, they last thing our team needs is another striker. This season the boys had no problem scoring goals, they just let too many in. What I am getting at is there are two players on the team we cannot lose this summer and they are Gonzo and Iker. We all know Iker is not going anywhere, and I am pretty much ready to fight anyone who even jokes he should. It would be like me suggesting Frank Lampard and John Terry go to Madrid, it is just wrong and mean. So Mr. Perez hold onto to Pipita, and I am pretty sure he is happy as a clam in the white kit…so just don’t do something stupid like sell him. Oh and Maradonna when is he finally getting the NT call up he deserves?!?!

Real Madrid's front line of the future? Fine by me.


Much more on my thoughts on the season, the rest of the team, and potential summer transfers coming up in the next few weeks as I get over my initial end of the season depression.
All pictures from daylife

First off not going to talk about basketball, still depressed and a nice Zags dedicated post is coming soon.

Golf- Arnold Palmer tourney is going on. No Camilo or Sergio so my interest is fairly limited. Tiger (or le tigre as I like to call him) is playing, and playing well, finished as of Saturday….waiting to see what happens on Sunday. I am starting to get a bit of a crush on Le Tigre, I don't know maybe it is the same effect Roger Federer has on me, hmmm. Masters is coming up soon woohooo!! *imagines Camilo in green jacket*

Football- Lots of world cup qualifiers, and a few friendlies. England seemed to dominate in their friendly, I did not want to cough up the $20 to get it on PPV and since I have dial up I am waiting until I can get into town and get on real internet and watch some replays. Sounds like my Chelsea boys, esp JT and Frankie did well.

Spain beat Turkey and looked ridiculously hot doing so as well. I must give a special shout out to my Blancos Iker and Ramos who just looked wow, not to mention both played incredible (especially el Ramos in his bright yellow boots). And I found yet another Spanish cutie who is way too young for me, Mata. I have noticed him before with Valencia but never knew his name, but now I do. Turkey’s keeper, Demeril is pretty frickin hot, but compared to Iker in an armband and el Ramos flashing a bit of his abs he barely registered for me this time around. The clock work orange also won, not particularly a fan (same with Spain) but there are a lot of Blancos playing for them, and Hunty scored a goal, and Robben took a great corner that also turned into a goal. Lots of other games, some teams won, some lost….Right now I am just not so patiently awaiting the England qualifier on weds. Oh yeah and Ballack scored for Germany, it was a beauty goal…now if he would only do the for Chelsea.

Right now I am watching US v. El Salvador. I have never cheered against the US or anything, but England has always been my team. I got into the sport watching England in the Eurocup when I was in high school, so the lions will always have a huge spot in my heart. But now I am making a big effort to cheer on the US national team as well, going with the national pride an all. Having eye-candy like captain Bocanegra definitely does not hurt, I am also starting to think Brian Ching is pretty hot too. Watching this game I have huge respect for our boys in the red, white, and blue. The boys were down 2-0 and then came back and tied 2-2, this turned out to be a great game to watch, and I had a ton of fun screaming at my tv. I am having a total loving of the USA team right now. Pretty much every El Salavdor player took a dive and stayed down beyond what they could reasonably milk in the second half. C-Ron himself would have even been saying, “come on get your ass off the ground pansy.” Those El Salvador fans look scary, it must take some serious marbles to play in front of fans like that. I may even attempt to get into MLS this year, I am in the market for a team to cheer for….if you have any suggestions feel free to try and convince me.

On another note, I am trying to figure out how to cheer for the US….do I say Come on USA? or Go USA? or just chant loudly USA! USA! USA! ? hmmmm does anyone know?

March 22, 2009
This Weekend in Sports (with pictures!)
Football
YAAYY Real Madrid won today, lots of great Dutchie goals and one from Marcello as well. My dear Gago did not play until later, and I don’t think Higuain played at all, meaning there was a serious lack of hot argentines out there, but oh well Iker, Canna and el Ramos held down the hotness and the defensive line (another shut out!!). And Mr. mmmmm mmmm Metzelder played!!! Unfortunately barca won yet again. Surprise, Sur-frickin-prise. Someone needs to lock up Messi until after the season, seriously. Some of us Kickettes had a great chat during the game today. (had a good one for Chelsea game too yesterday)

*on a slightly related note. The chat today has inspired me and I think I may turn my large wooded yard into a sanctuary for injured or retired footballers. Also may bring in the types of Messi and Xavi who are adorable but need to stop scoring goals for teams I don’t want to win *cough* barca *cough* and worry not, I am sure I will develop this brilliant plan more soon.

Golf
There is a tournament going on this weekend, have not really watched. There is a lack of Camilo and Sergio, and too much football and basketball so I will catch up next week for the Arnold Palmer Invitational.

Oh well here is some Camilo looking hotty-boombastic anyways. Mmmmm Bendy bend little lawn crawler.


Annnd those arms!!!


Sweeeet 16!!!

The Zags are in the sweet 16…helll yeah!!! Jesu-whattt! Get out the clear stripper heels espn because Cinderella is in the house this year!!! If you cannot tell I get slightly excited (and usually cry) if the Zags make it to the Sweet 16, I am hoping this is the year we make our return back to the elite 8 as well. We play UNC next. I won’t lie it will be a tough game, but a good game for us. UNC is not a huge team in size, does not bully and plays a running game. Basically don’t hit any of our weaknesses, so we have a fighting chance. And we beat them a few years back!! So bring it on Tar Heels my boys are coming!!

The Zags played Western Kentucky last night, looked like a thrilling game, I of course could not watch any of it because damn CBS would not show it here. So I watched Duke/Texas and slammed wine as I watched the Zags score. I did see the last minute and Goodson’s wonderful last minute shot to win the game. I was so proud. And thought to myself…he could teach Blake Stepp a few things about making a lay up under pressure. If any of you remember that game (I believe it was 2003) against Arizona, I will never get that image out of my head and will forever despise the University of Arizona.

I still am madly loving on Matt Bouldin…especially his pretty pretty arms my oh my, those things are beautiful. He has crazy eyes, yes, but also great hair and as I said the arms of a god. Not to mention his mad ass playing skills. He is quickly becoming one of my favorite Zags of all time, and is nipping on the heels of JP Batista. So here is some barely legal zaggy manmeat.



Oh and I hit a new low yesterday when I noticed a really hot player for UCONN (#33 I think) and felt the urge to say “that’s the best thing about college basketball players. I keep getting older, and they stay the same age”

Tennis
Indian wells is going on this weekend. I could not find anywhere showing it. But the Semi’s were Roger/Murray and Nadal/Roddick. Roger lost, I was sad so did Roddick…that also made me sad. So it is Nadal and Murray in the final and I am of course cheering for the Spaniard. Now I said I was going to not cheer for Nadal until he went sleeveless again, but I don’t like Murray so here I am. Not sure if final has been played yet or who won. Anyways VAMOS RAFA!!